Chapter 5 (Cont.)
Mary Mary Mary what are you thinking about my dear sister I looked at Mary she looked not at me she looked at the outside of the Gotard Residence. In the veranda she was she looked at the outside vacantly external stimulus internal inauguration of new senses new being new methods of learning. Mary, she was 8 years older than me so think think Chauvin when were you born Chauvin two years only two years before the nuclear destruction as mommy and daddy picked you up Chauvin they encased you from your lavish cradle Chauvin they picked you up unsuspected Chauvin for you it was just another day. Krallice is here my mother Krallice. My mother is picking me up. Just a regular day. Chauvin has arisen and now he shall learn how to walk. Chauvin will learn how to talk to his mother. Why is Benzo standing beside her? He was supposed to be busy at work Chauvin is not an early riser Chauvin goes to sleep when he's tired Chauvin wakes up when his tiredness is relinquished. Relinquishes. Benzo is conscientious. Punctual. Benzo wakes up not to his whims. Benzo is tethered to the duty. The duty calls. Benzo wakes up. Fuck sleep. The duty doesn't call. Benzo is vigilant still. Fuck sleep. But today Benzo is beside Krallice. My father and my mother together by my cradle at this inconvenient hour. She picked me up and carried me onto her bosom. Krallice did that often. But why is the pressure so tight now? And why do I hear irregular breathing? Why the fuck do I hear barely audible whimpers? As she held me, I looked at Benzo over Krallice's shoulders. Baby Chauvin looked at his father. Why is that smiling facade falling? Why is the righteousness on the trail towards doubt? Why the fuck do I hear nothing? Why are you not whimpering, father? Bah! You have the iron will still, Benzo! Relinquishes. Why does baby Chauvin care? The baby cares about learning to walk. He wants to know the ways of communication. And tangible emotions. Baby Chauvin couldn't detect any irregularities. There was no pressure, no agitation, no whimpers. There was no failing pride, there was no wavering vision, there was no misfired persuasions. Chauvin! You cynical bastard, you dare doubting the ones who are here just because they are your fucking parents. They are your parents, Chauvin. And this is just another day in Massachusetts! The sun has arisen and I shall learn to talk!!!
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Animal Affirm II / Self-Effacious Landscape